As most of you know, I’m in the middle of a transition in my life right now, but it’s way bigger than I could have ever expected, or maybe it’s just all happening in a short time, so it feels incredibly overwhelming (in a good way). Within a few months, I’ve gotten married, turned 40, launched my Healing My Skin business, and am halfway through writing my book! There is one more exciting life-changing event happening, too, that I can’t talk about right now, but I promise to fill you in as soon as I can! No, I’m not pregnant! 🙂
It’s all been quite surreal—that’s truly the best word to describe it. What’s really sinking in on my journey is discovering that, when you go out of your way to become your best self, really magical things happen. What I mean by becoming your best self is everything from taking control of your health, to chasing and believing in your dreams, to everything in between.
The in-between means taking stock of every moment in your life and working to find more happiness in each one of them. And, I use the word work because being conscious of our behaviors and our attitudes is a huge part of what leads us to become our best self. It is not always the things on the outside that make us happy; often, it is the thoughts and beliefs from the inside that need to be modified so that we can make the best of situations around us. Taking mindful and compassionate control of these moments, dousing them with self-love, and then moving forward in our practical day-to-day affairs is what truly defines being our best self—at least in my mind.
Once you nurture your mind, then it is time to work on the external in-betweens, such as taking time to exercise (even if only for 20 minutes), spending more time with friends or family, trying a new veggie with dinner, tackling one little task you might have been putting off (that you know will feel like a burden lifted when complete), or anything that gets you feeling good about trying to move forward—even though some days that might seem impossible.
The point is that when we develop and work on creating our best self we are doing the most important thing, nourishing ourselves with self-love, and this is key to a happy and healthy life. It could be anything from thinking of two things you are grateful for before going to sleep, to saying I love you to yourself in the mirror, to whatever that extra loving thing is that will somehow pass along the beautiful message to the universe that you want more of these things in your life because it makes you feel so good. Just remember, you get what you expect, so go ahead and expect things in your life to get better, easier, and happier! Expect your skin to be clear and those spots of Psoriasis to fade away. What have you got to lose by expecting the best for your life? In my opinion, you will only gain!
My new transition has brought up some terrifying yet exhilarating emotions in me. Luckily, the exhilarating emotions far outweigh the terrifying ones. But, even though wonderful things are happening, there is still stress involved. It is good to remember that when you are going through a stressful time. When I used to audition, I would be so grateful I had the opportunity to act that day. It was wonderful, but along with it came the fear of being judged or not doing well. My nervous system felt unsafe in that room, and I would sometimes find myself shaking. I would plow through it, though, because I refused to let the fear stop me. Even if I came out of there feeling awesome, it was still stress on my body. So keep that in mind, whatever you’re doing—starting a new job, going on a date or a trip, whatever great thing it is—there will always be stress that comes along with it in some way. It’s how you handle the stress that matters.
My average day lately is a game of ping-pong in my brain with thoughts that look like this:
“Move the hell over fear, you are not standing in my way!” to,
“Can I do this? Ok, breathe Kim!” to,
“Hell, yeah, I got this!” to,
“What if I’m not good enough and fail?” to,
“I always believed I was supposed to do something big, this is it!”
I can assure you, you are not the only person whose mind can race all day long!
Somewhere in my body, I’m scared and shaking; but, at the same time, I’ve never felt so happy and ecstatic. I’ve been walking around super-overwhelmed, yet on cloud nine! Have you ever felt both yin and yang at the same time? It’s stressful on our bodies, and I realize I need to calm the hell down. I know that all those ping-pong thoughts are not good for anyone.
Because I am just like everyone else, human, I wanted to share my four ‘go-tos’ that work best for me to get myself grounded and quiet my racing thoughts so that I’m not all over the place. PerhaPs when you are feeling a bit yin and yang they will help you as well:
1) Step outside, ground your feet (especially if there is some place you can take your shoes off and step in the grass) and/or take a walk outside—even if it’s just around the block.
2) Meditate, even if it is only for two minutes, and even if it is just taking a succession of deep breathes in and out, five seconds for each, a few times in a row.
3) Step away from the electronics, silence your phone for one minute, turn off all the external computer, TV, music, and auxiliary noise and listen to the beauty of silence.
4) And, my ultimate favorite, watch the synchronicity of the birds flying above. You can do this while you are walking around the block. You can walk to your window and look up. For this, I’d even let you look at this on a computer screen, because looking at the synchronicity of the birds is like looking at fish swimming in a fish bowl; it calms the mind and can physically reduce your heart rate. I always watch the birds while I’m waiting for the train. I can’t help but seek them out, up there on that platform.
Strange, but now they find me! I’ll be driving and out of nowhere a huge flock of them will gracefully fly by in such incredible unity. It is amazing. It forces me into the present moment more than anything else. The moon does that for me as well. I love to stare at the moon. You get my point. Find anything in nature, in its perfect creation, to focus on, and you will find your mind has taken a quick break from its worries. When is the last time you stopped working or talking on the phone to admire a beautiful tree or flower?
It’s time. Your transition time is here, so think about the exciting things you are on the verge of. Think of how you are going to be healed soon. Think about how you are going to be the person who will give yourself self-love at all times and think about having your mind and body merge in the unified and beautifully loving way that you deserve. Know that you are loved. Actively work to do things that will make you happier. Try out a few of my suggestions and know that your body was designed to heal. The way the universe sends the flock of birds to your life, the way they work in unison, that is what your body can and will do for you. So, transition for the better. Stay hopeful and know that if you need help, motivation, a shoulder to cry on, or a word of encouragement, I am here for you.
Remember, you get what you expect. I always expect to have an impact on this world, and so should you. What would happen if we all expected greatness and moved the universe in that direction? Greatness would be achieved. Now, that gives me chills. And that is what motivates me to want to help transition you!